Gotta confess I have mostly but not completely stayed home during these past 9 days. Today I went to the Big Save and to Times supermarkets with a short but challenging honey-do list (but never was able to find eggs or toilet paper). I also filled up the truck with gas and got a little cash from the ATM.
I kept my distance from everyone, was very conscious of what I touched, used my debit card (not cash), and washed my hands immediately afterward.
Other than that, I have been home this past week…except for that one afternoon when I could not resist driving to Koloa and visiting my 3-year-old grandson Rixon, son Dylan and daughter-in-law Leeona. I just could not stay away and convinced myself that as long as we did not get too close, that it would be ok. Some will say I was irresponsible and risked both getting my family sick and getting myself sick, and the guilt and tangible harm that could result.
But I did what I did, feeling at the moment that so long as we kept the social distancing in place and refrained from touching and hugging or close contact, that it was safe. We were mostly outdoors around a picnic table, under a tree with a barbecue and cooler nearby.
I went for two hours without touching my grandson and then had one small lapse in judgment. Rixon and I were standing next to each other (a few feet apart) when in what is a time-honored crude and juvenile male type of tradition…I extended my finger to him and asked him to pull it.
With his eyes as big as saucers and with just a tiny bit of hesitation, he reached over grabbed my finger firmly and pulled hard. I will not go into further detail as to what occurred next, but at that moment we both erupted in full-throated laughter and giggles. It was seriously one of those times neither of us will ever forget. Should, however, either of us now fall ill, I am not so sure how funny it will remain, but the moment cannot be taken back.
So, besides going a bit stir crazy now and again (as evidenced here), I remain mostly self-quarantined at home. As mentioned in an earlier column I am not sick, have no symptoms of any kind and to my knowledge, I have not been exposed to Covid-19. I’m staying home because it seems like the right thing to do, and because as a person of relative privilege, I can.
As to the question of whether or not I would ever ask my granddaughter Isabella who is just slightly younger than Rixon to participate in the same crude (some would say disgusting) ritual as I did with Rixon—-What do you think? Shield the sweet little girl or treat both grandchildren equally, regardless of their gender?
Note: This blog post was scrutinized prior to making it public by several friends and the initial reaction was mixed – but all agreed it made them laugh. My purpose in writing the post was both to make people smile but also confess to my lack of discipline in breaking my self-imposed quarantine, and acknowledge the bad judgment. I understand also that “flatulence humor” may be seen by some as unseemly. But hey…I can blame this on being stir crazy, a temporary lapse in good judgment and/or on being retired and being able to do and say what I like, or on my interest in expanding my writing…or whatever 😉
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wonderful to read; thanks for sharing ❤
Go Gary… we needed that goofy story!
Thanks for your work, wherever it takes you!
Thanks for sharing Gary. Your courage shows up once again.
Local style humor!! Keep it up!!
On another note, who can truly sort out what really is going on concerning cruise ships docking in Honolulu, supposedly to refuel and restock. Where are the ships getting their supplies? Hard to believe the ship crew really does stay on board while docked. Sorry this may not be the appropriate place for this issue
Not sure I have a good answer for you. Normally I encourage you to speak to your district councilmember or the State Senator or Representative who represents your district. The only people that really know for sure would be the department of transportation people and people actually on the docks…but probably not someone who is easily accessible to the public, especially during these times. Wish I had a better answer for you!
Too funny. I totally understand. And you made me laugh even though it might not have been one of your smarter moves! Oh, well…
Yes! Making you laugh was my intent in initially writing, but then I realized the other more important lesson that needed to be shared as well. gh